Top 5 Deities Who Want to Send You to Hell

1. Jesus
He's not taking this whole Falwell thing well.

2. God
He's sick of everyone fighting over Jerusalem. How would you feel if three different enraged fundamentalist groups were all up in your Holy of Hollies?

3. Zeus
Quit ignoring me, Bitches! Signed, The King of Gods.

4. Donald Trump
"You're Damned!"

5. Tuberculous
That's some real Hell.