How Can We Make Kids Think Smart is Cool?

Now that Paris Hilton is jailed forever and Nicole Ritchie is either pregnant or eating entire bowls of cereal in one sitting, it's time we teach the young women of the world what cool really is. Now we can sway any female who has been fooled into thinking that either getting a spray-on tan or dating a man with a spray-on tan is acceptable behavior.

Now is the time to say to the young women of the world: one day you will look at list of the greatest books ever and say, "I'm a fucking idiot who can't be alone. I've wasted my life and my money on hair extensions."

And, as Wittgenstien, my podiatrist, suggested, if you can get the attractive women to go, the men follow.

So let's use Obama's sexiness to bring young women into the political process. And while I prefer Hillary in 08, I definitely see Obama as our key to involving PYTs in a public conversation that matters.

Hence the "Crush on Obama" video with its early-90s-Keenan-Ivory Wayans-film-vehiclesque vibe is our best hope for young women to see who is really bringing the sexy, so to speak, back.